What Does The Bible Say About Leaving Family?

What Does The Bible Say About Leaving Family? When you grow up or become mature, it is important to graduate from being dependent to being independent. Also, when you marry, it is important to step away from depending on your parents for your livelihood and emotional support, and rather depend on each other. Is moving out of your childhood home a sign of disrespect, abandoning, or actually leaving your parents behind? As we unfold this piece of writing, we’ll find answers to this pertinent question. However, God did not mince words when instructing a married couple to leave their parents. Genesis 2:24 clearly states that “a man shall leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave to his wife.” The Hebrew word used in this verse means “to forsake dependence upon,” “leave behind,” “release,” and “let go.”

In the New Testament, Jesus Christ poured more light on this subject matter as he said that no one was ever intended to come between a husband and a wife (Matthew 19:6). Behold, no one! That is, no in-laws, no father, no mother was meant to bring division between a couple who had made a covenant with each other to leave, cleave, and become one flesh. Dan Allender, a psychologist, says in the book Intimate Allies that “the failure to shift loyalty from parents to spouse is a central issue in almost all marital conflict.” The Lord God Almighty knows that leaving parents will be a difficult transition, especially in homes where the child-parent bond is warm and solid. It is rather unfortunate that many couples do not cut the apron strings but rather lengthen them.

What Does The Bible Say About Leaving Family?

It is very important to understand that leaving your parents does not mean you permanently withdraw and no longer have a good relationship with them. Doing otherwise will be referred to as isolating yourself and not leaving. The commandment in Exodus 20:12 to honor your parents means that when you leave them, you need to go in love, respect, gratitude, admiration, and affirmation for their sacrifices and efforts in raising you. However, you must take a break from them and sever your dependence on them. As time goes on, you must be diligent to stay away from any reestablishment of dependence at critical points in your marriage. Note that leaving certain kinds of parents requires sensitivity. In the case where your mom or dad is a single parent, she or he may no longer have someone at home to lean on or may feel terrible being alone.

It is without a doubt that your leaving will create a big void in the home. Remember that your parents love you and will like to have you beside them. This is why it is very important for you to make your love and commitment clear to them while also switching your primary allegiance to your spouse. Always keep in mind that you can honor your parents and also reap benefits by seeking their wisdom on certain issues. It is important to make them understand that when you ask them to offer their insights, you are seeking information and advice, not surrendering your right to make final decisions. It is advisable to consult your spouse before seeking input from your parents.

What The Scriptures Say

There is much that the Scriptures say about leaving your parents as we’ll discover further. Genesis 2:24 says, “Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.” As recorded in Genesis 2, the Lord God Almighty created Adam first, and Eve second. The Lord God Himself brought Eve to Adam. They were ordained and joined together in holy matrimony by God Himself. He said that the two of them would become one flesh. This is a clear picture of marital intimacy – the act of love between two parties with the exclusion of any third party. To “cleave” means “to adhere to, stick to, or join with.” Behold, marriage is a unique joining of two people into one entity. A union that is not meant to quit when things are not going well.

The marital union is one that includes talking things out, praying things through, being patient as you put your trust in God for guidance, being willing to admit when you are wrong and asking forgiveness, and regularly seeking God’s counsel, wisdom, heart, and ways through His Word. If either spouse fails to both leave and cleave, problems will result in a marriage. Conflict and stress are likely to come up when spouses refuse to truly leave their parents and cleave together. Remember that leaving your parents does not mean ignoring them or not spending any time with them. Leaving your parents has to do with recognizing that your marriage created a new family and that this new family must be a higher priority than your previous family. As spouses, failure to recognize that you are joined together results in a lack of intimacy and unity.

What Does The Bible Say About Leaving Family?

Genesis 2:24 – “Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.”

1 Timothy 5:8 – “But if anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for members of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.”

Matthew 10:37-39 – “Whoever loves father or mother more than me is not worthy of me, and whoever loves son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me. And whoever does not take his cross and follow me is not worthy of me. Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.”

Matthew 10:34-37 – “Do not think that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I have not come to bring peace, but a sword. For I have come to set a man against his father, and a daughter against her mother, and a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law. And a person’s enemies will be those of his own household. Whoever loves father or mother more than me is not worthy of me, and whoever loves son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me.”

Luke 14:33 – “So therefore, any one of you who does not renounce all that he has cannot be my disciple.”

Group 1 – What Does The Bible Say About Leaving Family

Genesis 12:1-20 – Now the Lord said to Abram, “Go from your country and your kindred and your father’s house to the land that I will show you. And I will make of you a great nation, and I will bless you and make your name great, so that you will be a blessing. I will bless those who bless you, and him who dishonors you I will curse, and in you all the families of the earth shall be blessed.” So Abram went, as the Lord had told him, and Lot went with him. Abram was seventy-five years old when he departed from Haran. And Abram took Sarai his wife, and Lot his brother’s son, and all their possessions that they had gathered, and the people that they had acquired in Haran, and they set out to go to the land of Canaan. …”

Proverbs 22:6 – “Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.“

1 John 2:15-17 – “Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. For all that is in the world—the desires of the flesh and the desires of the eyes and pride in possessions—is not from the Father but is from the world. And the world is passing away along with its desires, but whoever does the will of God abides forever.“

Ephesians 6:4 – “Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.”

Group 2 – What Does The Bible Say About Leaving Family

Ephesians 5:31 – “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.”

Exodus 20:12 – “Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long in the land that the Lord your God is giving you.“

Romans 8:28 – “And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.”

1 Corinthians 11:3 – “But I want you to understand that the head of every man is Christ, the head of a wife is her husband, and the head of Christ is God.“

Psalm 127:3-5 – “Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb a reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior are the children of one’s youth. Blessed is the man who fills his quiver with them! He shall not be put to shame when he speaks with his enemies in the gate.”

Matthew 19:6 – “So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.”

Proverbs 12:4 – “An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, but she who brings shame is like rottenness in his bones.”

Matthew 19:5 – “And said, ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’?“

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Group 3 – What Does The Bible Say About Leaving Family

Proverbs 1:8 – “Hear, my son, your father’s instruction, and forsake not your mother’s teaching,“

Genesis 2:22 – “And the rib that the Lord God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man.”

Colossians 3:20 – “Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord.”

Colossians 3:21 – “Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged.”

2 Corinthians 4:18 – “As we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal.”

Colossians 3:19 – “Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them.“

John 3:16 – “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.“

Genesis 3:16 – To the woman he said, “I will surely multiply your pain in childbearing; in pain you shall bring forth children. Your desire shall be for your husband, and he shall rule over you.”

Group 4 – What Does The Bible Say About Leaving Family

Matthew 15:4 – For God commanded, ‘Honor your father and your mother,’ and, ‘Whoever reviles father or mother must surely die.’

1 Peter 3:1-2 – “Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, when they see your respectful and pure conduct.”

Proverbs 15:20 – “A wise son makes a glad father, but a foolish man despises his mother.“

John 14:6 – Jesus said to him, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.”

Joshua 24:15 – “And if it is evil in your eyes to serve the Lord, choose this day whom you will serve, whether the gods your fathers served in the region beyond the River, or the gods of the Amorites in whose land you dwell. But as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.”

Colossians 3:13 – “Bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive.”

1 Peter 3:7 – “Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.”

Group 5 – What Does The Bible Say About Leaving Family

Ephesians 6:1 – “Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.“

1 Corinthians 7:10 – “To the married I give this charge (not I, but the Lord): the wife should not separate from her husband“

Ephesians 5:22-24 – “Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands.”

John 10:14 – “I am the good shepherd. I know my own and my own know me,”

Colossians 2:1-23 – “For I want you to know how great a struggle I have for you and for those at Laodicea and for all who have not seen me face to face, that their hearts may be encouraged, being knit together in love, to reach all the riches of full assurance of understanding and the knowledge of God’s mystery, which is Christ, in whom are hidden all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge. I say this in order that no one may delude you with plausible arguments. For though I am absent in body, yet I am with you in spirit, rejoicing to see your good order and the firmness of your faith in Christ. ...”

Group 6 – What Does The Bible Say About Leaving Family

Luke 9:24 – “For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will save it.“

Luke 14:26 – “If anyone comes to me and does not hate his own father and mother and wife and children and brothers and sisters, yes, and even his own life, he cannot be my disciple.”

Proverbs 31:10 – “An excellent wife who can find? She is far more precious than jewels.“

1 Timothy 5:14 – “So I would have younger widows marry, bear children, manage their households, and give the adversary no occasion for slander.”

Genesis 2:18 – Then the Lord God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.”

Colossians 3:18 – “Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord.”

Ephesians 5:25 – “Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her,”

Galatians 3:28 – “There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is no male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus.“

Group 7 – What Does The Bible Say About Leaving Family

Ephesians 6:1-4 – “Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. “Honor your father and mother” (this is the first commandment with a promise), “that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land.” Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.“

1 Corinthians 13:4-7 – “Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.“

1 Corinthians 7:1-40 – “Now concerning the matters about which you wrote: “It is good for a man not to have sexual relations with a woman.” But because of the temptation to sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband. The husband should give to his wife her conjugal rights, and likewise the wife to her husband. For the wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. Likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. Do not deprive one another, except perhaps by agreement for a limited time, that you may devote yourselves to prayer; but then come together again, so that Satan may not tempt you because of your lack of self-control. …“

Group 8 – What Does The Bible Say About Leaving Family

1 Corinthians 13:1-13 – “If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing. Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; ...”

Romans 8:15 – For you did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received the Spirit of adoption as sons, by whom we cry, “Abba! Father!”

Matthew 19:1-30 – “Now when Jesus had finished these sayings, he went away from Galilee and entered the region of Judea beyond the Jordan. And large crowds followed him, and he healed them there. And Pharisees came up to him and tested him by asking, “Is it lawful to divorce one’s wife for any cause?” He answered, “Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female, and said, ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? ...”

Group 9 – What Does The Bible Say About Leaving Family

Romans 1:16 – “For I am not ashamed of the gospel, for it is the power of God for salvation to everyone who believes, to the Jew first and also to the Greek.“

Psalm 103:17-18 – “But the steadfast love of the Lord is from everlasting to everlasting on those who fear him, and his righteousness to children’s children, to those who keep his covenant and remember to do his commandments.“

1 John 4:19 – “We love because he first loved us.“

Hebrews 13:4 – “Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous.”

Revelation 1:1 – “The revelation of Jesus Christ, which God gave him to show to his servants the things that must soon take place. He made it known by sending his angel to his servant John,”

Titus 2:4-5 – “And so train the young women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled.”

Mark 10:9 – “What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.”

Group 10 – What Does The Bible Say About Leaving Family

John 4:1-54 – “Now when Jesus learned that the Pharisees had heard that Jesus was making and baptizing more disciples than John (although Jesus himself did not baptize, but only his disciples), he left Judea and departed again for Galilee. And he had to pass through Samaria. So he came to a town of Samaria called Sychar, near the field that Jacob had given to his son Joseph. …“

Acts 17:10-11 – “The brothers immediately sent Paul and Silas away by night to Berea, and when they arrived they went into the Jewish synagogue. Now these Jews were more noble than those in Thessalonica; they received the word with all eagerness, examining the Scriptures daily to see if these things were so.”

1 Corinthians 7:32-35 – “I want you to be free from anxieties. The unmarried man is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to please the Lord. But the married man is anxious about worldly things, how to please his wife, and his interests are divided. And the unmarried or betrothed woman is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to be holy in body and spirit. But the married woman is anxious about worldly things, how to please her husband. I say this for your own benefit, not to lay any restraint upon you, but to promote good order and to secure your undivided devotion to the Lord.”

Group 11 – What Does The Bible Say About Leaving Family

Ephesians 3:14-21 – “For this reason I bow my knees before the Father, from whom every family in heaven and on earth is named, that according to the riches of his glory he may grant you to be strengthened with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith—that you, being rooted and grounded in love, may have strength to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth, …“

Mark 10:7 – “‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife,”

Proverbs 19:14 – “House and wealth are inherited from fathers, but a prudent wife is from the Lord.”

Proverbs 15:27 – “Whoever is greedy for unjust gain troubles his own household, but he who hates bribes will live.”

Malachi 2:15 – “Did he not make them one, with a portion of the Spirit in their union? And what was the one God seeking? Godly offspring. So guard yourselves in your spirit, and let none of you be faithless to the wife of your youth.”

Group 12 – What Does The Bible Say About Leaving Family

Matthew 2:12-23 – “And being warned in a dream not to return to Herod, they departed to their own country by another way. Now when they had departed, behold, an angel of the Lord appeared to Joseph in a dream and said, “Rise, take the child and his mother, and flee to Egypt, and remain there until I tell you, for Herod is about to search for the child, to destroy him.” And he rose and took the child and his mother by night and departed to Egypt and remained there until the death of Herod. This was to fulfill what the Lord had spoken by the prophet, “Out of Egypt I called my son.” Then Herod, when he saw that he had been tricked by the wise men, …“

Ephesians 5:33 – “However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.“

Jude 1:7 – “Just as Sodom and Gomorrah and the surrounding cities, which likewise indulged in sexual immorality and pursued unnatural desire, serve as an example by undergoing a punishment of eternal fire.“

Ephesians 5:28 – “In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.”

Ephesians 5:21 – “Submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ.“

Ephesians 5:1 – “Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children.”

Group 13 – What Does The Bible Say About Leaving Family

Ephesians 5:28-29 – “In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church,“

Ephesians 3:14-15 – “For this reason I bow my knees before the Father, from whom every family in heaven and on earth is named,“

Ephesians 3:20 – “Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us,“

1 Corinthians 6:16 – Or do you not know that he who is joined to a prostitute becomes one body with her? For, as it is written, “The two will become one flesh.”

Luke 21:20 – “But when you see Jerusalem surrounded by armies, then know that its desolation has come near.”

Romans 1:1 – “Paul, a servant of Christ Jesus, called to be an apostle, set apart for the gospel of God,“

Luke 17:31 – “On that day, let the one who is on the housetop, with his goods in the house, not come down to take them away, and likewise let the one who is in the field not turn back.”

Luke 14:25 – “Now great crowds accompanied him, and he turned and said to them,”

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Group 14 – What Does The Bible Say About Leaving Family

Matthew 19:3-9 – And Pharisees came up to him and tested him by asking, “Is it lawful to divorce one’s wife for any cause?” He answered, “Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female, and said, ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.” They said to him, “Why then did Moses command one to give a certificate of divorce and to send her away?” …

Matthew 19:4-5 – He answered, “Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female, and said, ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’?

Matthew 7:13 – “Enter by the narrow gate. For the gate is wide and the way is easy that leads to destruction, and those who enter by it are many.”

Malachi 2:16 – “For the man who does not love his wife but divorces her, says the Lord, the God of Israel, covers his garment with violence, says the Lord of hosts. So guard yourselves in your spirit, and do not be faithless.”

Group 15 – What Does The Bible Say About Leaving Family

Isaiah 3:1-26 – “For behold, the Lord God of hosts is taking away from Jerusalem and from Judah support and supply, all support of bread, and all support of water; the mighty man and the soldier, the judge and the prophet, the diviner and the elder, the captain of fifty and the man of rank, the counselor and the skillful magician and the expert in charms. And I will make boys their princes, and infants shall rule over them. And the people will oppress one another, every one his fellow and every one his neighbor; the youth will be insolent to the elder, and the despised to the honorable. ...”

Malachi 2:14-16 – But you say, “Why does he not?” Because the Lord was witness between you and the wife of your youth, to whom you have been faithless, though she is your companion and your wife by covenant. Did he not make them one, with a portion of the Spirit in their union? And what was the one God seeking? Godly offspring. So guard yourselves in your spirit, and let none of you be faithless to the wife of your youth. “For the man who does not love his wife but divorces her, says the Lord, the God of Israel, covers his garment with violence, says the Lord of hosts. So guard yourselves in your spirit, and do not be faithless.”

Group 16 – What Does The Bible Say About Leaving Family

Proverbs 31:1-31 – “The words of King Lemuel. An oracle that his mother taught him: What are you doing, my son? What are you doing, son of my womb? What are you doing, son of my vows? Do not give your strength to women, your ways to those who destroy kings. It is not for kings, O Lemuel, it is not for kings to drink wine, or for rulers to take strong drink, lest they drink and forget what has been decreed and pervert the rights of all the afflicted. …“

Proverbs 31:15 – “She rises while it is yet night and provides food for her household and portions for her maidens.”

Proverbs 11:29 – “Whoever troubles his own household will inherit the wind, and the fool will be servant to the wise of heart.“

Proverbs 23:24 – “The father of the righteous will greatly rejoice; he who fathers a wise son will be glad in him.”

Proverbs 6:20 – “My son, keep your father’s commandment, and forsake not your mother’s teaching.”

Genesis 18:19 – “For I have chosen him, that he may command his children and his household after him to keep the way of the Lord by doing righteousness and justice, so that the Lord may bring to Abraham what he has promised him.”

Group 17 – What Does The Bible Say About Leaving Family

Deuteronomy 6:1-25 – “Now this is the commandment, the statutes and the rules that the Lord your God commanded me to teach you, that you may do them in the land to which you are going over, to possess it, that you may fear the Lord your God, you and your son and your son’s son, by keeping all his statutes and his commandments, which I command you, all the days of your life, and that your days may be long. Hear therefore, O Israel, and be careful to do them, that it may go well with you, and that you may multiply greatly, as the Lord, the God of your fathers, has promised you, in a land flowing with milk and honey. “Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. …

Psalm 23:1-6 – “A Psalm of David. The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures. He leads me beside still waters. He restores my soul. He leads me in paths of righteousness for his name’s sake. Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies; you anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. …“

Group 18 – What Does The Bible Say About Leaving Family

Matthew 2:1-23 – “Now after Jesus was born in Bethlehem of Judea in the days of Herod the king, behold, wise men from the east came to Jerusalem, saying, “Where is he who has been born king of the Jews? For we saw his star when it rose and have come to worship him.” When Herod the king heard this, he was troubled, and all Jerusalem with him; and assembling all the chief priests and scribes of the people, he inquired of them where the Christ was to be born. They told him, “In Bethlehem of Judea, for so it is written by the prophet: …“

Genesis 4:19 – “And Lamech took two wives. The name of the one was Adah, and the name of the other Zillah.“

Genesis 24:67 – “Then Isaac brought her into the tent of Sarah his mother and took Rebekah, and she became his wife, and he loved her. So Isaac was comforted after his mother’s death.“

Genesis 2:25 – “And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed.“

Psalm 133:1 – “A Song of Ascents. Of David. Behold, how good and pleasant it is when brothers dwell in unity!“

Proverbs 5:18 – “Let your fountain be blessed, and rejoice in the wife of your youth,”